Hopes & Fears for 2020


As Autumn fades away I begin to ponder the year gone by and what lies ahead.

Be honest, 2019 was really really shit. I wish I had a nicer way of wording it. I hope that's not the case for everyone, but the majority of people I've spoken to have also had a bad time. Not just in terms of our economy, government and brexit limbo of course, but personally I don't have many highlights.

During the year I finally fixed my pathetic excuse for eyebrows and moved to my dream home however; I also had a slight mental breakdown, felt totally useless for many months and witnessed my family going through the worst. 

Being the anxious girl that I am has given me ample opportunity to freak out about all of the personal things that could go wrong next year such as more financial worry and increased debt, the possibility of needing to find a new job (again) and failure in making my small blog ambitions a success. On a larger scale I'm increasingly worried about our NHS and the political climate as most of us I think are - will I have access to the medication I may need when I'm unwell? Will my family be able to have the mental health support they need to move forward? etc etc...

My list of worries could literally go on forever. The more anxious I become the bigger the list grows. You can always trust me to catastrophize every situation.


I have some hopes for the year ahead though. No goals specifically and no high expectations. 

I simply want a quiet year. I want continued stability in my work, to maintain a calm and mostly stress free lifestyle, to continue and finish decorating our home and to make my stamp as a blogger. That's it. Nothing major or unobtainable. Keeping my head down, working hard and reaping a small reward in the form of peace at mind is good enough for me. 

2019 came with a wave of negativity I wasn't anticipating nor was I prepared to manage at all, so I'm trying to be realistic and not set my sights too high. Basically, I will try to do the above mentioned if I'm capable.

In terms of our future as a nation, the one and only statement I can put together about our current path is this - The road ahead is full of uncertainties. I can only hope that things don't get worse. I don't believe this to be true currently and I'm so incredibly sad about the circumstance we find ourselves in today. I do however believe that I know many good people who will do all they can to be kind to those around them and look after their communities. 

Starting from now I'm trying to remain calm, trying not to overthink and to enjoy the holidays with my loved ones. I hope we can all do the same this season and find some solace over the coming weeks.

See you in 2020!

18 Comments

  1. I totally get your fears for the new year! I am graduating uni next year so the idea of heading out into the world and the pressure to get a job is super daunting!
    Yasmin / sliceofchic.co.uk

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    1. I graduated a few years ago so I can totally relate to that nervous feeling. I promise the future after uni isn't all scary though xx

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  2. I've been feeling particularly uneasy about the end of my year and to be honest I feel like I've been through so much, but I'm trying to be as optimistic as possible going into a new year and wanting to make it an amazing year. New decade and endless possibilities!

    Love, Amie ❤
    http://thecurvaceousvegan.com

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    1. I'm sorry to learn you've had a bad time this year too. Fingers crossed that 2020 is full of joy and little pain for us all x

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  3. I can totally relate to feeling anxious about going into the new year. For some reason, the fact that it is 2020 really stresses me out, despite it being like any other new year ... it's strange! I think its because now I've graduated, I'm starting a new job tomorrow and lots of things are changing! But I'm trying to be as positive as possible x

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    1. Change is incredibly scary but something to be excited about too. Everything will all fall into place soon and before you know it you'll be completely settled in your new job. Good luck starting tomorrow and I hope you have a fantastic 2020 x

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  4. I've had financial worries too and the election results have made me deeply uneasy. Trying to enjoy the small wonders tho

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    1. I think may of us feel the same. I'm so sad we are ending 2019 in such lows but, I'm hoping 2020 will be much more positive x

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  5. It is the small rewards and pleasures one reaps that add up in the end. I would rather have a steady string of small joys then one big one all at once.
    Mostly, for 2020, I look forward to opportunities. Whatever they may be, I look forward to change, and facing it with as much positivity as possible.

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    1. Agreed. I love the little achievements that all add up to something much greater. Wishing you a fantastic 2020 full of joy x

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  6. Thank you for posting this, your honesty is refreshing. My 2019 was also shit (no better way to put it really). I'm from the US, but believe me, we've been keeping the UK in our hearts and minds as you all face uncertainties in your future (especially with health care). Sending lots of positive energy your way, and best of luck in 2020. xo

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    1. Thank you so much for your kind words - I always strive to be honest in my writing and I would be lying if I felt positive about the position my country is in. I'm so sad to hear that you had a bad time this 2019 too but thank you to you and your fellow US friends who are thinking of us.

      Wishing you a fantastic 2020 x

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  7. I am sorry that 2019 didn't go well for you. Sometimes, we have these events to make us a stronger person. Hopefully you will have a wonderful 2020's. The future is always full of uncertainties and it depends on how you want to overcome anything that goes down your path :).

    Nancy ♥ exquisitely.me

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    1. Most definitely. This year has been a real test but I've learnt a lot that's for certain and I'm much much stronger than I'd imagined. Wishing you a fantastic 2020 x

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  8. I love that your goal is to stay calm. It's so simple and yet challenging. Sorry to hear that 2019 wasn't good for you, hopefully the next year is much better. All the love x

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    1. Thank you. I think I'm reasonably calm most of the time but, I just want to maintain that moving forward and avoid complicated situations where possible. Wishing you the best this 2020 x

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  9. I'm sorry your 2019 hasn't been so great! I don't think I've had a particularly bad year but my highlight reel is fairly small too. I hope you get a more positive 2020, maybe going into without higher expectations will make it one of the best x

    Sophie
    www.glowsteady.co.uk

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    1. Thank you. I had a lot of big hopes for my year that failed but, I also had some exciting things happen that I didn't plan either like moving to a new house. I hope you have a fantastic 2020 x

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